So I’m just going to start by being honest… this week was T O U G H.
Like really tough. Delle (my almost 3 year old) had meltdown after meltdown after meltdown. Hagen (the 1 year old) was super needy, clingy, teething (the trifecta). Work was crazy. Life was busy. You know this web the drill.
So here’s my confession… I failed.
Big time. Like lost my patience/temper/and sanity in the process. According to Daniel the Tiger (which I also let Delle watch way too much of)… I needed to “take a deep breath and ask for help.” That s&^* doesn’t work for adults. I took a million deep breaths, asked for help, and got nowhere.
But then, as I am sitting at our dining room table trying to cram in a few extra minutes of work in a quiet moment. Delle is sitting accross from me, recovering from her epic meltdown. And then, out of the blue, Delle gets out of her seat, comes over to me, and crawls in my lap. She cuddles with me. Tells me how much she loves. And wants to be near ME (the impatient, exhausted, distracted, emotional mess of a mom).
These are the moments in life that get me. The ones where I am so clearly shown such pure love and joy in the middle of my chaotic, emotional mess. Yes, I know this seems minor. And not really “blog-worthy.” But here’s what happened almost as soon as Delle crawled into my lap… I was instantly flooded with an overwhelming peace and reminded of Psalm 118:24.
Psalm 118:24 (ESV); “This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.”
I hugged Delle. I soaked in our really sweet 5 minutes. And was challenged on my gratitude. On my “rejoicing” and “being glad” (or really the lack thereof) in the present moment.
Quite frankly, this was an odd time to be reminded of gratitude. But sometimes that’s how God works. And if his subtle, peaceful prompting wasn’t enough, I opened my “The Songs of Jesus: A Year of Daily Devotions in the Psalms,” by Timothy and Kathy Keller. This is is what they said:
“Actually every day that your heart keeps pumping, your country is not invaded, and your brain keeps functioning is wholly an underserved gift of God. We ought to live simple, normal, uneventful days full of amazed, thankful joy (September 30).”
I just love that, “We ought to live simple, normal, uneventful days FULL of amazed, thankful joy.” So God, hint taken. I need a gratitude adjustment. And am now striving to BEGIN (baby steps right?) developing a more grateful heart… And here’s how: 5 things at the end of every day. That’s all. Just 5.
At the end of each day, I am writing down the “TOP 5” moments I am thankful for.
It’s a simple, small step that I know I need to take. It reminds me to be grateful because everyday is a NEW day. A new day filled with new opportunities, new trials, new tests, and new moments where Delle curls up on my lap and tells me how much she loves me. And I want to remember those… not the stuff that wore me out.
It’s easy to get broken down by the tensions and trials and tests of this life (and especially motherhood).
And all too often that where my perspective stops. That’s what my mind almost immediately get locked in on… the “hard stuff.”
But I’m finding that through the lens of gratitude my heart is softened and my emotions eased.
& That’s what I need more of. A softened heart and a whole lot of “eased emotions.”
So that’s all for today. Just a simple reminder to find ways to PRACTICE GRATITUDE, to thank God for the good and a challenge to begin developing a grateful attitude.